Where Does Your Time Go?

“Where does the time go?” “Time flies!”  “Time waits for no man!” 

We’ve all heard sayings about time throughout our life. When I was about 12 years old I remember I made a comment about how time flies, my father in turn said, “yeah, and it only goes faster the older you get.” It’s true. Not because the clock changes or the seconds, nor the minutes…. Our lives do. We have more responsibilities, more time consuming tasks, we are pulled in so many different directions all the time!

Have you ever thought about people who do significant things with their life, make a real difference in this world and in others’ lives? People who always seem to have time to do what they want, when they want? Have you ever said to yourself, “if I only had more time I would do this or that?” We ALL get the same 24 hours in a day. No one gets more, or less.  It’s what we do with those hours and minutes that make a difference.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself – What am I doing with my time? Is it productive? Is it wasteful? Is it endearing or resentful? Is it edifying or draining you?

I am great at multi-tasking, but I have had to take a good, hard look at my own time management lately. There are so many things I want to accomplish and yet, I have been pretty slack in getting them done…..including this blog! Where is my time going? Well, I will be brutally honest and tell you that a lot has been wasted. YES, wasted! On what you ask? While evaluating my time and what I was doing with it I realized that there are a few things that were robbing me personally of my time - my cell phone and the TV. Ok, I just heard the gasps of people reading this as they can’t imagine giving either of those up.

Think about how much time you scroll through Facebook on your phone, how often do you check your email? Every time you hear a little “ding” announcing something new has been posted or sent to you do you pick up your phone and look, and then continue to look at more on there. It’s amazing how we have become a society of scrollers. I am guilty too. I told myself the other night that I would just pop on Facebook real quick to take a peek and see what’s up and I was finished scrolling through an hour later. There was nothing of real importance on there at the time either.

How many of you reach for your Smartphone first thing in the morning when you wake up? I don’t mean to turn off your alarm, yes I do that too. Do you check messages, texts, emails, Facebook? Is it the last thing you look at before you go to bed? I was in bed ready to go to sleep when I got on Facebook. I lost an hour of sleep that I truly needed. Here’s one for you…. Do you check your phone in the middle of the night if you got up to go to the bathroom? My cell phone is a necessity. It is my lifeline to my family when I am not home.  However, I don’t need to use it all the time when I am home. I don’t go overboard on using my phone for everything. I haven’t been on Facebook in a couple of days. I do check email often but I don’t play games on my phone, I really don’t have time for that. I know I can shave off some time wasting here!

TV – the other enemy of my time. There are nights I just want to veg and tune out the world and my day. 4-5 hours later I am ready for bed, where I then got on my phone (again) and spent another hour. 5-6 hours WASTED! I could have been doing something more productive like laundry, dishes, writing! Even if I needed a break from the mundane chores of life, I still could have been more productive with my time (especially on commercials!). None of these things were edifying or changing me as a person.  I’m not saying TVs and electronics are evil. Everything is better with moderation. So often we are caught up in the “fun, easy” things in life that we think demand our attention, when in fact they aren’t demanding, but persuasive because they are fun and distracting. This causes us to forget about the important things that should have our attention.

What are we feeding ourselves on a daily basis? I’m not talking about food for your stomach, but food for your mind! The most influential people in this world are ones who soak up knowledge and invest in their minds. They read, and not just for entertainment but to broaden their perspective. They spend their time doing things that are truly useful, not wasteful.  I began reading a great book on leadership for about 15-20 a day. Actually, I am juggling 3 books right now and they are fantastic. I have cut back the TV time and sometimes don’t even turn it on. I have even curbed my son’s watching time too. We actually spent 2 hours playing games yesterday. That was precious time making memories instead of watching a movie I probably have already seen.

 The one thing I did notice with the TV off, the chaos was quiet too! The TV is more of a distraction and noise maker with everything else going on. I’m not ready to give up my DirecTV just yet, I do like watching The Voice and a few other shows. However, the DVR is a great invention and I can watch it when I feel I have other things done that needed my attention… including my son!

Those who seem to have all the time to do a lot of things in their life have mastered their time management. They value other important things rather than the time wasters. They are only time wasters if we let them steal our time away from what we need and want to do. Take a few days to look at all the things you did in those 48-72 hours, actually take a whole week. Make note of everything each day throughout the day and see where your time really goes and then take a look at what you can eliminate, reduce or move around to give you the time you really need to do the things you really want.  You’ll be amazed at how much time you can find for yourself and even for your family.

Always remember the clock doesn’t stop even though we want to. Also, take TIME for you. Everyone depends on you and you have to recharge, refresh and regroup for them and you too!

Smiles –

Marcy 

The Warrior Within

I have been through more battles than most people face in a lifetime. I have stayed positive and my outcomes have been good. I am a Warrior in Christ and I believe how you look and react to a situation can determine the outcome.

Warriors face battles head on and fight to overcome and be victorious. I believe God gives us the weapons and training to defeat the devil and all he has to throw at us. Psalm 18: 31-6 says For who is God, except the Lord? And who is a rock except our God? It is God who arms me with strength, and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of deer, and sets me on high places. He teaches my hands to make war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze. You have also given me the shield of Your salvation; Your right hand has held me up, Your gentleness has made me great. You enlarged my path under me; so that my feet did not slip. . . . vs.39 - For you have armed me with strength for the battle; you have subdued under me those who rose up against me.

I do not tell you of these battles to stroke my ego or for the wow factor. This is merely my story to share so that others who are facing difficult times can know they are Victors and not victims as well.

In a nut shell – I almost died having my son due to an eclampsia seizure, he was born 10 weeks early and weighed 2lbs 13oz. I went through 5 miscarriages (2 before and 3 after my beautiful son). Took care of my father-in-law who had Dementia/Alzheimer’s and Bi-polar disorder. Lost and buried 3 parents (both in-laws and my father). Lived through an abusive marriage and domestic violence, dealt with an alcoholic husband. Battled breast cancer and won. I take care of my ailing mom and I’m a single mom who worked full time for a non-profit. I am currently pursuing my dreams now that I am unemployed at the moment. All of this within the last 15 years.

Through all of the trials, tribulations, tests and just plain bad things that happen I have had to keep a positive attitude. I believe the way we react to something determines the outcome. I have had to fight and pray like a warrior. There was no quitting, it’s not an option. I love the Navy Seal mantra NDCQ – Not Dead Can’t Quit!

No matter what life throws at us, and it will, we have to stand strong and move forward through it. Face your challenges head on and be determined to get to the end of them. Don’t dwell on the issue or problem, work through the solution and make getting to the end of it your goal.

When I found out I had breast cancer I asked straight up after my biopsy what I was facing if it was positive. The doctor told me surgery, radiation and no chemo, we had caught it early. It was positive and when they told me I had cancer, all I could think of was let’s get this over with and get the treatments off my calendar. I have too much to do to let this get me down and hold me back.

This was in mid March of 2013 and I asked the surgeon if I could wait until the end of June to have surgery because I had a big fundraiser coming up the end of April for my job. He said, “Nope, May 1st is your surgery due to the fact the cancer you have is a high grade, fast growing cancer and we need to get it out. It can double in 30-60 days.” So, I had my fundraising event on Saturday, April 27th, my birthday was the 28th, worked Monday the 29th, cleaned house and did grocery shopping on Tuesday the 30th, had surgery on Wednesday, May 1st and was back to work by the following Wednesday. 30 days later I started radiation and went through it every day for 6 weeks.

Half way through my radiation the fatigue set in and I was one of the 20% of people who burned really bad from the treatment. I never missed a day of work due to scheduling my treatments in the late afternoon so I could go home for the day. I didn’t really have anyone who could go with me, so I drove myself to all of my appointments alone. My cancer team was amazed at my upbeat attitude through the whole ordeal. They told me most people by this point are depressed and still reeling from the fact that they have a cancer diagnosis. I told them I don’t have time to let this get me down and I have too much to do. I had the “cancer gene” test done because of the type I had and I was ready to have a full mastectomy and hysterectomy if needed to keep me around to watch my son grow up. Thankfully it came back negative.

I am by no means a super woman for all of this. I had wonderful friends who provided meals when I had surgery. I will tell you I cried at night during my radiation because I felt like I was going through it alone. I had no one to hold me and tell me it was going to be OK. I still had a mom and a son to take care of, and they helped love me through it too. I had a clean bill of health by September. GOD is the one who got me through this. He strengthened me and I relied on Him daily to get me through it all!

My point in all of this is I had to have the right frame of mind and a warrior attitude to get through it. No one has the same kind of diagnosis or time frame to recover from something like this. I just happen to do it in 6 months and moved on. I was blessed in the fact that I didn’t have to have chemo. It is 2 years later and I still feel fatigued easily, but I keep moving forward.

Our mindset and attitude can totally change the outcome of any situation we are facing. Change is never easy, life is never easy. We face battles daily and we have to be prepared. How do we get prepared you ask? Just like any warrior... you train! You feed your heart and soul with the word and prayer. You gather up your army of guardian angels for protection and I put up my shield of faith and stand tall and strong ready to fight at the call. No matter what comes our way, we are made to overcome.

We may get wounded, we may get tired, but CHRIST holds us up, He is our strength. Do not wallow in your situation, do not look around at all the mire you may be in. Look ahead and figure out how to get out of it and move on. Most of all, trust God for direction. Warriors evaluate their situation and find a solution to get out of it. They figure out quickly what to do to overcome and win.

Warriors get tired and fatigued too. Resting in Christ strengthens. Psalm 91 says He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High, will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord "He is my refuge and my fortress; my God in whom I trust." Rest in God and ask Him to strengthen you and give you the heart and weapons of a warrior.

When I share my story with others, they are inspired as well. Not to shine light on me, but the power positive attitude God has blessed me with. I want to inspire and encourage you to take on that attitude and know YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS! Keep YOUR Warrior spirit and be a Victor - Not a victim of your circumstance.

Smiles - Marcy

What Kind of Tree are You?

I love trees. Unique pictures of trees make me smile, there is just something majestic about them. As I look at the trees that God has created, I realize more and more how much our lives parallel them in so many ways. There are thousands of different species of trees. Each one inside that species is different as well. No two trees are the same. Some are tall, some are short, and some have many branches, others not so many. One may be full of foliage, the other not so much.  

As people we are all different too. We are alike and yet different in so many ways. We all need the same things to survive. We need food, water, sun, oxygen. Yet we may be from one culture or another, we all have different personalities. Some have deeper roots than others. For some of us, our seeds are planted and we grow in gardens and forests and never leave; some of us blow through the wind and grow where we land.

Just like trees, some of us grow strong because we water and feed our hearts and souls with healthy things. There are weak trees that aren’t being fed the right things. If the environment we live in is making us weak, we will continue to be weak and not live as strong and healthy as we should. Then we will not survive or be as strong as we should be. As the tree’s branches rise toward heaven, we raise our hands to heaven when the sun is shining on us and all is well.

When dark clouds, rain and storms come our way in life and block the sun, too often we wonder what we’ve done or why are we going through this. We seemed so surprised when the rains come and darken our days. What we don’t remember is storms and rains are a part of the cycle of life. It is needed to make things grow. As much as we need the sunny days to feel good and strong, we need the rain to grow as well. The deeper our roots, the more storm we can withstand. You need the water for the roots to grow deeper.  If you are married and the two of you stand together side by side, the stronger you are in the storm as well, and the more you protect your children during that storm. Feeding our roots with the Word of God and Praising Him, Trusting Him and most of all having Faith in Him, will grow your roots even deeper. Storms may strip you of your leaves, but you will grow even fuller and stronger after it passes and be even more beautiful for it. Even the fire storms in life purge the old growth to make room for new.

The best part? Storms don’t last forever. They eventually go away, usually in a matter of hours or even days, but never months or years. Have you ever seen a storm last forever? Keep looking toward the end knowing that whatever you are going through, it too shall pass and the sun WILL shine again. No matter the damage caused by the storm, you will grow once more. You will be even stronger for it and yes, when the sun comes out you will raise your branches to heaven and thank God for getting you through it.

How we react to storms in our life will determine the outcome. Do we fear the wind and rain, the lighting and thunder? Or do we stand strong and face it head on? Do we think that this will never end? Or this will not last forever? Do we hold on to our Faith in God that He is protecting us, growing us and feeding us through all the turmoil? Or do we think He has abandoned us and left us to fend for ourselves?

Think about what kind of tree you are and what does it take for you to grow tall and strong. How and what are you feeding your heart and soul to make you the person you are? What can you do to be the person He wants you to be?

Psalm 1:3  *    Matt 6:25-34   *   Matt 7:17-20

Smiles - Marcy

What makes us HAPPY?

What makes us “happy”? A feeling of euphoria, something that makes us smile and laugh, feeling or showing pleasure, contentment, or joy. Maybe makes your heart and mood feel lighter? Just the word "HAPPY" sounds funny.

What makes me happy? I'm I happy when the kitchen is clean and the house is picked up? Or is that a feeling of satisfaction or contentment that it is done? My 12 year old son, Michael, is always in a good mood and seems happy. Even when he is sick. Always smiling, humming or singing. The innocence of a child with very few responsibilities yet who doesn't have much to worry about except for what he wants to play or what snack to eat. Oh to feel that innocence again. He always makes me happy. I can't help but smile when I watch him or listen to him play. He even sometimes brings a tear to my eye because I am so proud that he is a happy child and I can sometimes see the world through his eyes.

I have to admit he gave me a pretty happy moment the other day. Grammy (my mom I take care of) wanted some French toast. Michael asked if he could help and I thought why not. So he got to break the eggs in the bowl, dip the bread in and put it in the skillet and then I let him flip them too, all while he was standing on a stool to reach the stove, as I stood close by. So basically HE made French toast. The happy moment.... was when he turned to me with joy on his face and said, "I love cooking, thank you for letting me cook with you. This is so much fun!" I just realized that something so mundane to me and no big deal was a big deal to him. I got to see it through his eyes. I was happy in that moment and it lifted my spirits.

So back to "happy". I guess there are levels of happiness too. What lifts your spirit and makes you feel light and giddy and just plain happy? We don't feel it all the time and sometimes we are desperately looking for it. I have a few friends lately been wondering the same thing. They love their family and think the world of their kids and still, they have an overwhelming feeling of sadness or blue. Do we get so caught up in our everyday tasks that we sometimes forget to look at the brighter side of things and enjoy them? Do we let little moments that we could cherish forever slip by because we were too busy with something?

 I know I can get caught up in all my "duties" and it starts to bring me down and I begin to wonder when is there "me" time? I know there a lot of things that used to make me happy, and I needed to sit down and figure out what they were. One of the things I enjoyed before all my responsibilities kicked in was writing. I thought about writing a book for those going through the same things I went through, then I read a friends blog and it inspired me. I kept hearing my friends and their struggles and it dawned on me, why wait to write a book when you can help on a daily basis with a blog. So, I began writing again and for me it is a release and it makes me happy. It gives me a little "me" time.

Sometimes, we need to CHOOSE to be happy. No matter what the situation, we can decide if we want to let it get us down or make us grumpy, or we can choose to be happy. We can’t always control the outcome of things, and things happen all the time. How we react to them and how long we decide to let them control us makes for our attitude. Sometimes you just have to laugh at the situation, work it out and move on. We all have had days when it seems like one thing after another seems to fall apart. Instead of getting mad and irritated…laugh. Laugh so hard that no matter what else happens, you laugh again. You’ll feel better at the end of the day, because that day will be over and a new will begin.

Take a moment to really figure out what truly makes you happy and then take the steps to make it happen. We have to MAKE time for ourselves. It is so easy to get caught up in taking care of everyone else that we are always last to think about us. I am telling you it is OK to think about you and do something for you once in awhile. If we don't we won't recharge our batteries to keep doing what we need to. Remember a lot of people rely on us and though in a perfect world we would love for someone to take care of us, it is our responsibility to look out for ourselves and find what it is that helps you recharge to keep going on. One of the first places I suggest looking is to God for peace, love, comfort and even happiness! He can recharge our batteries better than anything this world has to offer. He can also help direct you to the things that make you happy. Proverbs 16:20.

Smiles and be HAPPY!   Marcy 

The Enthusiastic Life!

I love the word ENTHUSIASM!   No one has ever accused me of never being enthusiastic. My life overflows with enthusiasm. People ask me sometimes how much caffeine I have had, when I tell them I don’t drink caffeine their eyes bug out of their heads and they take a double take at me. They can’t even imagine what I would be like if I did do caffeine. HAHAHA!  

What is Enthusiastic Living? Living life to its fullest. No matter what comes our way, no matter how big the challenge, face it head on with enthusiasm. Every challenge I have had, every event I had to plan, job I had to do, I faced it with a great attitude. You don’t have to be happy ALL THE TIME – just keep a good attitude toward whatever it is in life you are facing. Especially the bad, mundane, the uncomfortable, even the unknown.

Being enthusiastic helps you get through it a little faster, a little happier and oh yea….. just get through it.

This blog will have many different stories I hope will enlighten you, inspire you, motivate you and change you. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not trudged through on a daily basis. We will look at Leadership, Change, Dreams, Overcoming Obstacles, Learning to be Victors and NOT victims of our circumstance and more!

So a take some time to enjoy this journey of life and live it ENTHUSIASTICALLY!

Smiles –

Marcy Patten